As I begin working on the music for the third installment of the PNK KanD Project, I can’t help but notice this (kind of insane) habit I have.
When I was in high school, I was infatuated with Nicki Minaj’s music. Then, as I became an adult, I found myself drifting away from her music and what she had to say.
Now that I’m 30, I’ve realized that I actually do that quite often.
I seem to have a cyclical appreciation for the rapper’s body of work.
Last year, I was very disappointed with the release of Pink Friday 2, finding that it was actually quite negative and sad compared to the original Pink Friday of 2009. And I haven’t really been able to force myself to listen to any of the music she has put out since that release.
But, to quote myself, “once a Barb, always a Barb.”
Reading through lyric snippets that I’ve collected in my notepad over the past couple of years, it is undeniable how much I have learned from Nicki Minaj.
(I mean, c’mon now, the first installment of the PNK KanD Project is dedicated to Nicki Minaj for Pete’s sake!) And now that I’m beginning my third album, I have found myself returning to her music again to learn more about about wordplay. Because Nicki Minaj is an undeniable GOAT of intelligent wordplay, in music that is fun to listen to.
But honestly, this blog entry isn’t even actually about Nicki Minaj, or her craft.
It is a reminder that it is okay to circle back to things that you thought you’d grown out of. Ie, styles, music, philosophies, spiritual beliefs, hobbies.
Whatever you find yourself circling back to, remember that it is, in fact, okay.
These days, I haven’t really enjoyed Nicki Minaj’s new music and stopped trying to listen to it because her words just don’t connect to my wavelength anymore. A lot of her music has been about tearing her “opponents” down, partying, sex, and break ups and I’m neither in a partying nor a breaking up phase in my own personal timeline… I also tire of overtly raunchy lyrics, and kinda hate trash talking.
But that doesn’t change the fact that the original Pink Friday era made me who I am. And it doesn’t change the fact that Roman Reloaded got me through my senior year. It also doesn’t change the fact that Queen helped me find the power to improve my adult life. And it definitely doesn’t change the fact that I still know all the lyrics to my favorite Nicki songs.
So, I will finally admit out loud that I have a love-hate-love relationship with Nicki Minaj. And that’s okay.
It’s kind of like those glow-in-the-dark adhesive stars and moons you can stick on your ceiling and walls… even though I outgrew them, they still gave me an intense inspiration to appreciate the cosmos that they represent.
E.
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